


Lovers on the Bridge

by Sophia_Bee



Category: Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Ghosts, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-01
Updated: 2014-10-01
Packaged: 2018-02-19 11:22:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2386523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sophia_Bee/pseuds/Sophia_Bee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Veronica returns to the bridge every night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lovers on the Bridge

**Author's Note:**

> This could be a companion piece to Jumper

The only substance is the fog. It amplifies the sound of his shoes scraping across the concrete, sending tiny pebbles tumbling into the blackness below. It swirls over the bridge and makes drivers grip their steering wheels tighter, hurrying home to their families. They don’t notice the car parked beside the road.

‘I used to come here. I’d sit on the edge and look down at the water. It was so far down.”

His words are whipped away with the wind. Veronica takes a sip of Skist and leans back in the fake leather seat of the Lebaron, trying to tell herself that it doesn't matter if he falls as he teeters on the cement wall, arms spread out, swaying in the gusts that shake the windows of her car. She doesn't say anything, just sits and watches. There's nothing left to say.

He's not really there.

“When I hit I felt the air rush out of my chest and all my bones shattered into these hard, sharp pieces.”

His mouth twists in a strange grin and she knows he hopes he’s getting to her. He wants to make her stomach churn, make her feel his pain. She doesn't tell him that she’s felt his pain all along. His pain has sat in her gut, gnawed at her ever since she held him in the hotel lobby and his tears wet her t-shirt.

She comes here every night. Sits in her car with the lights off, staring out into the dark sky. He's always here with her, talking to her, pacing along the wall, teetering on the edge. The first time her breath caught and she almost pushed the door of the car open and ran to keep him from slipping over the edge.

Somehow she managed to stay still.

“I remember the ambulance ride. Sort of. I remember lights and voices above me. I remember hurting.”

At first his words were comforting. The only thing she’d wanted to hear was his voice. Now she wants him to stop telling her the same story over and over. Yet she returns every night, pulls over to the side of the road, turns off her lights and waits. And he always appears, materializing out of the shadows cast by the moon and the headlamps of passing cars.

“I remember the square fluorescent lights flashing overhead. There was sharp stabbing pain with every breath. But most of all, I remember your face.”

She’d opened the door that night wanting news. She’d smiled and said out loud what she’d been thinking.

_I was hoping it would be you._

She knew her call would get through, that she’d get the information to Logan before he did something stupid. Now she stared at Weevil’s face, strange in the dim light of early morning. His brow wrinkled, his eyes small and dark. She knew something was wrong. They’d been wheeling him in on the gurney when she pushed through the emergency room doors and stared down at his face, pale and covered with blood.

That night was the first night, after the hospital and the doctors. After watching Trina give the performance of the lifetime, the quintessential concerned sibling as long as she thought someone was watching. That was the first night she drove to the bridge. It was the only way she could think of to be closer to him. He was there, just like she’d suspected.

“I loved you.” He says, the wind ruffling his dark blonde hair, blowing his unzipped jacket behind him. Veronica winces at his words. She doesn’t want to think about whether or not they contain truth because the truth will only implicate her in his death.

_Not yet. He’s not dead yet. Stop thinking that way, Mars._

“You didn’t love me.”

She doesn’t realize she’s said it out loud until she hears the strange sound of her own voice in the stillness of the car.

“You never loved me.” She whispers, starting out the windshield, at his figure silhouetted by the moonlight.

He turns and looks at her, his mouth slightly open as if he was about to say something then thought twice about it.

“I’m sorry.” She mouthed silently, knowing her words don’t matter. Nothing matters.

He jumps down from the ledge and sits on the concrete, his elbows resting on his knees, his eyes boring into hers.

“When they shoved that tube down my throat it hurt like a son of a bitch….”

Veronica puts her fingers in her ears. She doesn’t want to hear. He wants her to hear and his voice echoes in her head. She shakes her head, prays for his voice to disappear, but it won’t go away.

“Then there was a warm tingling feeling and the next thing I knew, I was standing here. Back to the beginning.”

_The beginning_

The beginning was on the balcony of the Camelot. The end was on the beach with his eyes boring into hers, her hair tickling her face, her dad running across the sand and fear knotting tightly in her chest.

_You killed Lilly._

“I never would have hurt her,” He said, swinging his legs a little. “You knew that. At least I want to believe that the girl I loved wouldn’t really believe I was a killer.”

_You never loved me._

Logan stands up and paces in front of the car, looking at the ground, then looking up at her.

“I did love you. I don’t know why you don’t believe me. What do I have to lose by telling the truth now?”

He turns away from the car and looks out into the blackness and Veronica hears him mutter.

“What do I have left to lose anyway?”

_Nothing. Everything._

“Me,” Veronica whispers. “You have me to lose.”

He doesn’t hear her. He just stares into the blackness hands shoved deep in his pockets. His voice keeps echoing in her head. Insistent, drilling into her brain.

“My father killed my girlfriend. My sister is a bitch. My mom…”

Veronica holds her breath as Logan throws his arms up to the sky.

“My mom swallowed a lot of pills and booze before she threw herself off this bridge. She thought it would keep it from hurting when she hit the water. It was like hitting concrete at 100 miles per hour. She was so brittle that she shattered into a million tiny pieces.”

Logan turns around and looks at her again.

“Do you know where she is? She’s stuck under a log somewhere, bloated and rotting and she’s pissed. She thought it would be tragic and glamorous. There’s nothing beautiful about being swollen and waterlogged. No one told her there’s nothing glamorous about suicide.”

Veronica didn’t say anything.

“She wants me to come home,” Logan started pacing again. He scuffed the ground , sending another shower of pebbles skittering across the cooling asphalt. “I saw her when I first got here and she said it’s time for me to come home.”

_No._

“It’s funny. I always thought there’s be some type of tunnel and a flash of light or something like the movies. Fuck, I think my dad even did a ‘go toward the light’ type of scene in one of his movies. It’s nothing like that. It’s just her and she wants me to come home. And you know what…”

Veronica forgot to breath. She couldn’t speak. She just sat, watching Logan, wanting this all to end but not wanting it if it meant he was going to leave.

“Veronica!” Logan snapped his fingers and her head around to look at him. He was close, leaning against the passenger window. “I kind of want to go.”

_No._

“What’s here for me?”

_Me. I’m here._

“I loved you Veronica,” Logan said.

“No, you…” Veronica started to say he didn’t love her. After all, how could someone love in such a short period of time? He didn’t love her. He loved that she could rescue him. He loved her normalcy. Her loved…..

“I loved all those things, Veronica.” Logan said softly. “And I loved you.”

“No.” Veronica licked her lips and tasted salt. She brought a shaking hand to her cheek and it was wet.

“I have to go home. She’s there and she loves me and there’s nothing left here.”

“Logan.”

“Veronica, I have to….”

Her breath hitched and Veronica felt her chest clench with pain so intense she almost doubled over. Her mouth hung open as she watched Logan turn away from the car and climb back onto the cement ledge. He spread his arms out and lifted his face into the wind.

“Time to fly.”

His voice drifted on the wind and Veronica pounded fists onto the steering wheel, the sting of pain jerking her back to reality.

“I loved you too.” She screamed into the silent car and she knew she’d have bruises on her hands the next day. “Don’t leave me. I loved you too.”

Logan turned and looked at her, just stared without saying a word. Then he smiled and Veronica heard the tones of her cell phone. She never took her eyes off him as she rummaged blindly in her bag, her hand finally closing around the vibrating phone.

“Mars.” She said sharply into the phone, trying to make her voice sound as normal as possible.

“It’s Weevil,” the familiar voice crackled in her ear. Veronica shut her eyes tightly.

“Hey,” She said softly.

“It’s Logan. He just woke up.”


End file.
